The Suicide-Savior Game

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The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by SkeeT on 2014-08-18, 2:38 pm

1. COME UP WITH A WAY TO SAVE THE PERSON IN THE POST ABOVE FROM KILLING THEMSELVES

2. NEXT, COME UP WITH A WAY TO KILL YOURSELF

3. WAIT FOR SOMEONE TO SAVE YOU

4. LAST PERSON TO POST KILLS THEMSELVES LEL

- - -

Example:

Poster One: I jump into a pool with cement bricks tied to my ankles.

-

Poster Two: it was the shallow end.

I cut out my own tongue
- - -

Let me begin:

I go to sleep in a garbage compactor.



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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by apex on 2014-08-18, 4:50 pm

The garbage compactor is made of kittens.

I jump off a 50 story building

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Mold on 2014-08-18, 4:51 pm

the building is made of kittens.

I'm smothering my face with a kitten, and i'm allergic to them.


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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by apex on 2014-08-18, 4:55 pm

(Technically if the building was made of kittens I would still die from hitting the ground)

The kitten ends up being an ocelot which you are not allergic to but it scratches the shit out of you

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by SkeeT on 2014-08-18, 7:03 pm

@Apex wrote:(Technically if the building was made of kittens I would still die from hitting the ground)

The kitten ends up being an ocelot which you are not allergic to but it scratches the shit out of you

plz remember to suicide

- - -

I drink hemlock



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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by lbass on 2014-08-18, 7:08 pm

The hemlock is made of kittens

I jump into a pool of lava





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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by SkeeT on 2014-08-18, 7:24 pm

The fall you take into the pit is only 10 feet, and your vision is really bad, as the lava is actually millions of severed human penises covered in orange highlighter fluid. The dicks soften your fall like a Tempurpedic mattress underneath you.

I endeavor into space, and get sucked into a worm hole.



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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Robin Hood on 2014-08-19, 4:21 pm

The worm hole spits you out into Jdoog's mama's house.

I shoot my new recurve bow straight up so that it will land directly on my dome.


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Trouble has a habit of finding me."

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by SkeeT on 2014-08-19, 4:53 pm

Exiting JDooG's Mama's house, I yell "Pull," and trap-shoot the arrow out of the sky with my antique double-barrel Lefever shotgun.

The recoil of firing both barrels made me trip over a rock and begin to plummet to the bottom of the Grand Canyon.



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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Przy on 2014-08-20, 1:30 pm

The rock is actually a naked black woman who ain't need no man and proceeds to throw you back onto the side of the cliff as she falls down.

A naked black woman who ain't need no man falls from the sky as I'm taking a tour through the Grand Canyon, dooming me to be a pile of brown skin, red, and bone mush.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Guest on 2014-08-20, 1:50 pm

The naked black woman was so fat her jelly rolls was a parachute, flying her away from hitting you.


I got hit by a coin flying from the top of the empire state building square in the head.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Mold on 2014-08-21, 4:35 am

the coin is now a kitten, which does not travel through you head as the surface area, multiplied by the velocity and divided by the density of the kitten squared, will cause a large kittexposion on your head, leaving your hair a bloody, furry mess. Yet you will not die.

I'm going to kill myself because of all the fucking kittens on the internet. Shotgun blast to the face.


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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by apex on 2014-08-21, 4:41 am

The shotgun is filled with a semen-like substance and you experience something more of a glory shot rather than suicide.

I find a way to create a lightsaber in real life and cut off my head

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Guest on 2014-08-21, 1:06 pm

There is no way to create a lightsaber in real life that isn't just a super high voltage beam of thin light, therefore you cannot die, and a strand of kitten hair was trapped in the hilt, therefore it doesn't even function in the first place.

I wrote my name in the Death Note.

SAVE THAT.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Przy on 2014-08-21, 5:45 pm

I erased your name because you don't write in pen.

A kitten scratches me and I get AIDs.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by apex on 2014-08-21, 6:51 pm

The AIDs is made out of kittens

I set up an intricate system of levers pulleys to drop my broken PC on my face from an extraordinary height which causes my head to explode

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Goku on 2014-08-21, 6:59 pm

The intricate system of lever pulleys has actually malfunctioned and dropped a bucket of water on you instead.


I jump out of an airplane at the tip of the atmosphere without a parachute naked.


"Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habit.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny
Watch your destiny; it becomes the eye of the beholder" ― Lao Tzu


     

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by lbass on 2014-08-21, 7:57 pm

Airplanes can't reach those altitudes. You jump out at a safe 20,000 feet and land in a pile of kittens, softening your fall.

I create a device to allow me to travel in a 4th dimension to the Jurassic ages, where I smack a bug on my arm and create a paradox, thus making me disappear from existence.





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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Goku on 2014-08-21, 8:18 pm

Turns out the bug on your arm was actually a leaf and that you were hallucinating, no harm done.

I go back in time to the medieval ages and try and assassinate the king of a castle on a mountain side, failing to do so I get arrested and am going to be executed in front of the public..with a over sized morning star dropping on my head and crushing it to little bits.


"Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habit.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny
Watch your destiny; it becomes the eye of the beholder" ― Lao Tzu


     

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Guest on 2014-08-21, 10:31 pm

The executioner was a scam - he couldn't aim so well therefore he accidentally hit the board which bound your head and also hit your chains, freeing you as he accidentally rebounds it off the ground to his head. You escape within seconds.


I walk across a narrow open alleyway where two motorcycles run straight at me from both sides, with no room for me to move to the side.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Goku on 2014-08-21, 11:16 pm

The narrow open alleyway goes up real high and because of your quick reflexes, you jump over the motorcyclists and you start climbing up the walls to saftey.

I take a traveling trip to South Africa and my dune buggy gas runs out and i'm stranded. I get captured by an ancient tribe of half naked indians and they put spears to my neck and take me to a big open arena-like area which i'm surrounded by spikes of death, rhinos, tigers and vicious animals of all sorts, no way to escape, just death as their whole clan laughs at me and cheers while chewing on rotten rat flesh, I take one last gulp and look at the world as I can before I prepare to have a gory brutal fatality.


"Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habit.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny
Watch your destiny; it becomes the eye of the beholder" ― Lao Tzu


     

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Yaos on 2014-08-22, 3:18 am

A squadron of Clones and Jedi swoop down in gunships Geonosis style and destroy the vicious creatures with their leet lazers and swords and take the local populace captive, though a few choked on their rat from surprise.

I jump out of the gunship and land on a spike.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by apex on 2014-08-22, 4:01 am

(Funny, I almost commented saving him the exact same way lmao)

You are blobbed out of the air by a clone before hitting the spike, only suffering minor fall damage.

I challenge Han Solo to a pistol duel, he shoots first.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Yaos on 2014-08-22, 5:22 am

Surprisingly, he misses, and you don't.

He hits me instead.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

Post by Guest on 2014-08-22, 1:10 pm

You were wearing armor that reduces damage from gunfire, surprisingly.

I accidentally walk in on the mustafar fight between Anakin and Obiwan. They prepare to slash me from both sides.

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Re: The Suicide-Savior Game

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